What is Sexual Addiction?
How much sex or the type of sex does not define sexual addiction. Sexual addiction is used to describe how it feels to be in the grips of sexual behaviours and thoughts that are difficult to stop. Sex is used like a drug to manage, often unconsciously, painful emotions and beliefs about oneself.
Sexual addiction may have been set up in our younger years. It might have been in response to the stressors of growing up, including meeting family and social expectations. Alternately, it might be related to sexual, emotional, physical or spiritual abuse. Extraordinary events and environments beyond the individual or family’s control may have contributed to this addictive pattern.
Having a sexual addiction is not a choice. It is not the fault of the individual nor of their partners. It is often a shameful, difficult, and lonely experience both for the individual and for their partners. We offer support to help you understand sexual addiction and to make changes that lead to a more fulfilling, healthy experience of sexual relationships.
How therapy can help:
We understand the impact sexual addiction has on one’s life, the shame it may raise, and the difficulty in talking about it. Dr Thaddeus Birchard & Associates established itself as the first clinic of its kind to work with sexual addiction in the UK. We are specialised therapists in this field and understand the difficulties in talking about and addressing sexually compulsive behaviours. Learn more about our sexual addiction Treatment Programme.
Am I a Sex Addict?
Internet Pornography
Engaging in online sexual behaviour is easy because it is:
- Anonymous
- Affordable
- Available 24/7
- Accessible anywhere from most devices
- Specific to your sexual interest
- Provides variety of sexual images and practices
How therapy can help:
We understand the impact sexual addiction has on one’s life, the shame it may raise, and the difficulty in talking about it. Dr Thaddeus Birchard & Associates established itself as the first clinic of its kind to work with sexual addiction in the UK. We are specialised therapists in this field and understand the difficulties in talking about and addressing sexually compulsive behaviours.
To learn more about how Internet Pornography effects our brains, as well as find further outlets for advice and support, explore Additional Resources
Treatment Programmes
Initial Consultation
Our treatment programme starts with clarifying your needs. We use a comprehensive, holistic approach that includes both a consultation with a medical professional and a qualified sexual addiction therapist. A full range of programmes within Dr Thaddeus Birchard & Associates and in the London area that may complement your therapy is discussed with you.
Individual Therapy
We offer a skilled team of qualified, trained therapists unique in the UK to work with sexual addiction. We carefully consider and find the therapist whom we feel will offer you a style and approach that best supports your needs. Your confidential sessions take place with non-judgemental therapists who are used to talking about sex and relationships.
Group Therapy
Group therapy is a powerful, dynamic part of addressing sexual addiction. Our clients report this as being an invaluable component in recovery. We keep our groups limited to ten people. Each group meets weekly for twelve weeks, including one weekend. To provide continuing support through your recovery, we offer up to three sequential twelve week sessions. Together, the group learns more about the neuroscience and the cycle of addiction. We explore the origins of your sexual addiction and support each other to make a sex plan to avoid relapse and find a healthier, satisfying sex life.
Therapy for Partners
We offer specialised individual therapy for partners to help cope with the impact of sexual addiction. There is also a high demand for our 6-week group programmes for female partners. Contact practice administrator Raj Khera to learn more.
Relationship Therapy
Couples often benefit by bringing their understanding of themselves and their individual needs in relationship into therapy. Working with a couple’s therapist we help you understand the relationship dynamic, building better skills in communicating with one another, and developing more positive approaches and experiences.
Low cost
For those without, or on low, wages, we provide low cost options for initial consultations, individual therapy, and group therapy. Request for low cost assistance must be made while setting up your first appointment.
Support for Partners
Dr Thaddeus Birchard & Associates is the leading clinic experienced in working with couples and partners where sexually compulsive behaviours are disrupting the relationship. It is important to support partners of sex addicts in understanding they are not at fault for the compulsive behaviours. Partners may need additional information about sexual addiction, as well as support in setting boundaries and charting an acceptable way forward. Gaining insight into their roles in relationships and how they relate to the addict is often a major feature of partner therapy.
Keep these things in mind:
You did not cause it- You cannot control it
- You cannot cure it
How therapy can help:
Individual Therapy: It is important to have someone to talk to about your feelings and about sexual addiction in general. Having a confidential, safe person to talk to satisfies the urge to tell someone what you are feeling, without creating the potentially damaging impact that can result in immediately discussing with family or friends. We offer programmes that give you a safe place to express your feelings, explore the relationship, and chart healthy next steps. Our programmes include:
Relationship Therapy: Couples may find that working with a couple’s therapist will help make the relationship dynamic more clear. Couples therapy can assist in developing better communication and, creating more positive opportunities for relating to one another.
Programmes for Women: Our specialist therapists offer individual therapy to partners of sex addicts. Our 6-week group programmes for female partners supports you in understanding sexual addiction, validating your feelings, exploring your role in relationships, and moving forwards.
Low Cost: For those without incomes or on low wages we provide low cost options for initial consultations, individual therapy, and group therapy. Request for low cost assistance must be made while setting up your first appointment.
Explore Additional Resources.
Sexual Dysfunction
Sexual Dysfunction & Desire Disorders
Sexual problems may arise from stress in our lives, how we feel about ourselves, and/or anxiety about our sexual performance. These problems may affect our arousal, desire, and physical performance and response. Our therapists are trained in psychosexual therapy and work with you to address your concerns. We use established psychosexual therapeutic methods to resolve the problem. When these issues occur within a relationship, we may look at support in therapies you both might benefit from as a couple. Sexual functioning and/or desire can deteriorate in a relationship and may be hard to resume with neither party knowing exactly how to move on. Some common sexual problems include:
Programmes focus on:
- Loss of desire
- Difficulty reaching orgasm
- Pain during sex
- Early ejaculation
- Delayed or absent ejaculation
- Erectile dysfunction
We work with you to:
- Open up about sexual issues that may be too difficult to discuss with others close to you
- Identify how stress, previous experiences, or relationship issues may be contributing
- Develop psychosexual exercises to try at home
- Re-engage with positive sexual experiences
Relationship Therapy
Relationship Therapy
When conversations between partners have become difficult to talk about together, relationship therapy can help aid communication, understanding, and appreciation of each person. Supported by a trained therapist, the hidden, often unconscious, dynamics that each person brings into the relationship are explored in a safe, non-judgemental space. We also offer individual therapy to each member of the relationship to explore how your past and present experiences help shape your view of, and your role in, relationships.
Programmes focus on:
- exploring trust
- improving positivity
- building on positive experiences
- learning better communication skills
- problem solving
- onward planning
The sessions are built around regular and enjoyable exercises done at home that redirect the focus in the relationship and replenish satisfying, positive qualities.
Therapists work with you to:
- Explore the Relationship
- Understand more about the issues
- Act to put into practice more helpful ways of interacting
Sexual Orientation & Gender Identity
Sexual Orientation & Gender Identity
We believe there is a variety of naturally occurring sexual preferences within a large range of human sexual patterns. We know that recognition of one’s sexual orientation may bring problems of identity and one’s place in the family and larger society. Sexual orientation includes one’s sexual attraction, fantasies, and behaviors. Our sexual identity is how we describe ourselves as sexual beings, often, but not always, in relation to our sexual orientation. One may identify as homosexual, heterosexual, pansexual, lesbian, gay, queer, transgendered, bisexual, asexual, etc. Our sexual orientation and identity may stay with us throughout our lifetime. Alternately, for others, these may be more fluid and shift as we grow older.
Common feelings include:
- Confusion about what you find sexually arousing
- Uncertainty how you want to identify your sexual self
- Denying or hiding your feelings of arousal from self and others
- Fear of being rejected socially (friends, family, colleagues), abused, or bullied
- Loneliness and isolation
- Depression
We work with you to:
- Open up your concerns and questions
- Explore what is comfortable for you at the present moment
- Identify what feels safe and what supports might be available
- Develop comfort to identify yourself in your way
- Celebrate who you are
Other Specialist Services
Mood Disorders
We provide a supportive, safe environment for you to talk with a therapist about your feelings.
Anxiety
Symptoms:
- Restlessness
- Panic
- Fear
- Easily fatigued
- Difficulty concentrating
- Sleep disturbance
Depression
Symptoms:
- Frequent crying
- Loss of interest
- Lack of energy
- Sense of hopelessness, guilt, worthlessness
- Weight gain or loss
- Change in sleep patterns
- Difficulty concentrating
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
Symptoms:
- Unwanted persistant thoughts, urges, or images
- Repetitious Behaviour
- Inability to manage time
How therapy can help
We provide a supportive, safe environment for you to talk with a therapist about your feelings. Our therapists will tailor your treatment to your needs and goals. We work with you to determine whether therapy-only, or in combination with medication, will be most effective. Cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) is often an effective form of therapy that helps us recognise the triggers for the symptoms and gives you the tools to modify cyclic thoughts, negative feelings, and behaviours. Learn more about our therapeutic team.